My mind keeps talking

    08-Mar-2020
Hope fractures when faith tricks you, brightness was never the hunger for light but how well you can avoid the dark. There is never an exit door of the past, history will never die but fears and bad memories are to get used to not left behind. If all we do is gaining time and death is the end, then the world must have been way worse than you ever can imagine. When death walks off the earth, your deeds will walk the earth, stories will water the continuation of your existence. If life was just like highways, speeds would be just the game. It’s all those curvy, forever-under construction road that represents life. How bright and powerful the stars might but the distance makes it do nothing more than just twinkle. How good and lovely the person might be, once trust have distanced him or her from you, do nothing more, just wish the person all the goodness. At times, we forget the person who kept you going while missing the person who stopped you.
There I stood at the end of the end, thinking worthless is my middle name, crying for those I should have done and wondering what’s next might lift me. Then there came the wind, whispering a lullaby for me not to give up through the broken hopes. Eyes brows up, chin up, arms wide open against the wind, I yelled my own name. The louder I yelled, higher it echoed and the longer I shouted, lengthier it echoed. Those obstacles that favored in echoing - those trees and mountains - are nothing but like the society. The more I yell, the longer I will hear my name. The strong wind took my tears way till my ears, I realized something that day. From that day I never stopped yelling my name, for no one will even remember me if I stop yelling.
Heated hate hunt for humor in the seriousness, embedded enemy inside everyone earns emptiness upon amplifying your happiness. You aren’t what you look like in the mirror but what you like about in the mirror. Change is life, you are the person in making, it’s never too late to start early. Safety is not staying out of trouble but being conscious of the problem while handling the problem. Close your eyes & say, “I am a possibility,” destiny is not where life takes you but having faith in your possibilities. Every now and then you cry about things you could have done but it’s never too late to praise yourself for what you chose over what you shouldn’t have. Death is not a misery, it’s the phenomena that defines time, life, love and relationships, for dead might do some apart but love stands irrational against the death to deny it’s physical compulsion of lost. Comfort stops you from learning, confronts stops you from loving, complaining stops you from exploitation and compassion give you a good neighbor.
Sometimes winters are not to make you have a hard Christmas but to make you appreciate that tiny blossom near your window during spring.
Sometimes people leave you just to make you know how it feels when you leave someone. Sometimes the first floors are the easiest to climb but never has the perfect balcony. Sometimes you only find the true love after someone cheats on you. Sometimes faith is all about believing in what you can be. Sometimes it’s not love that breaks your heart but expectations. Sometimes kisses are not to quench the lust but to shrug the love. Sometimes it’s the color white that makes the other colors a possibility. Sometimes it’s the smile that changes a life for lifetime.
But at times it’s the chances that you choose to change for centuries. At times it’s the wishes unfulfilled that makes you believe failures are just an outcome not a wall.
Have you ever had yourself asked all these to yourself?
‘Why did you sell out my dreams to depression for some comfort? Why did you partner my faith with failures? Laziness kept giving me different definitions of success. Why did you make me believe that it’s okay to fail and to never get up? Gone are my green and welcoming days, gone are my smile that had reasons, gone are my happiness with cause. You won’t let me live or die either. Every time I want to suicide you tie me up with purpose of life and when I want to live you take away the purpose. I forgot the last time I looked in the mirror, I am forgetting me, I am forgetting my existence and this is true. Are you listening to me? Please change me, and if you are teaching me a lesson then am sure you are the worst teacher.”
If you have asked the last paragraph to yourself, trust me you are not different from me. All I have is, everything gets better, just hang on. 
The writer is a Motivational orator, who currently resides in Canada. Subscribe to his YouTube channel ‘Live With Bir’ to watch motivational. He can be reached at [email protected]; Facebook – Birkarnelzelzit – Young Thoughts; Twitter – Birkarnelzelzit, INSTAGRAM – Birkarnal.