Navigating life's crossroads – Effective approach to decision making

Ningthoujam Ingocha Singh
The Weight of Choice
Life often places us at crossroads—moments where the decisions we make carry long-lasting consequences. These choices shape our future, define our identity, and determine whether we move forward with fulfilment or live with regret.
To understand the gravity of these moments, let us look at three distinct stories where aspirations, expectations, and values collide.
Three Stories of Dilemma*
1. Sonia’s Story: The Guilt of Financial Reality
Sonia’s parents, having missed out on education themselves, were determined to give their daughter the best. Viewing education as a wise investment, they enrolled her in a prestigious, expensive school.
However, the economic situation in Manipur became unfavourable, making steady income difficult. Now, midway through her schooling, they are struggling. They are considering transferring her to a more affordable school but are crushed by guilt, feeling they are breaking their promise to her.
2. Johnson’s Story: The Trap of "Sunk Cost"
Johnson is in his fourth year of attempting the medical entrance exam. He previously qualified for dental studies but turned it down due to parental pressure to pursue MBBS. Now, he is paralyzed by anxiety: should he sink another year into preparation or pivot to a new career path ? The weight of the years already "lost" clashes with the fear of disappointing his parents.
3. Jorshika’s Story: Love vs. Ambition
Jorshika, raised in a humble family, has always aspired to economic independence. However, her focus is currently fractured by a rocky relationship with a possessive boyfriend. She loves him, but the relationship is jeopardizing the competitive exam preparation that is her ticket to a better life. She stands at the crossroads of emotional attachment and professional discipline.
The Toolkit for Clarity
We often make decisions based on immediate emotion. But what if we used a structured framework ? The Seven-Step Decision-Making Process provides a roadmap, which becomes even more powerful when combined with two specific tools:
• The WRAP Model:
1) Widen your options (Don't just choose between A and B).
2) Reality-test your assumptions.
3) Attain distance before deciding.
4) Prepare to be wrong.
5) The 10-10-10 Reflection:
6) How will I feel about this in 10 minutes?
7) How will I feel in 10 months?
8) How will I feel in 10 years?
Applying the Tools
Case Study A: Sonia’s Parents (The Financial Dilemma)
Sonia’s parents face a difficult decision: whether to continue her expensive schooling or transfer her to a more affordable institution. Using the WRAP model, they widen their options beyond a simple “stay or leave.” They consider scholarships, crowd-funding, or requesting a partial fee waiver from the school. Next, they reality-test their assumptions. They fear Sonia will feel betrayed, but by talking to her, they may discover she values a happier, less stressed home over the prestige of a school badge. Through the 10-10-10 reflection, they weigh the emotional and practical impact:
• In 10 minutes, they feel guilt and sadness.
• In 10 months, they may experience relief from financial strain.
• In 10 years, they could feel pride that the family survived together and Sonia was supported emotionally, not just financially.
Finally, they move to action. They discuss openly with Sonia, co-creating a plan and framing the decision as a strategic family choice rather than a failure.
Case Study B: Johnson (The Career/Parental Dilemma)
Johnson faces a difficult decision : Whether to attempt the MBBS exam for the fourth time or pivot to a new career path.
(To be contd)