Where generations meet: A daughter’s Waroipot and the blessings of family
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Sanjoo Thangjam
In the warmth of home, the echoes of past generations bless a young life stepping into its future_
There are moments in life when emotions refuse to remain simple. They gather quietly with joy, memory, gratitude, longing and reflection, forming a feeling that words often struggle to fully capture.
One such moment came during my daughter’s Waroipot, a deeply meaningful ceremony held at my residence as she prepared to step into a new chapter of her life.
In Meitei tradition, Waroipot is far more than a ritual. It represents a family covenant, a moment when elders gather to offer blessings, counsel and goodwill to the younger generation before marriage. It reflects a belief deeply rooted in our culture that important transitions in life should begin with the collective wisdom and goodwill of family.
On that calm morning, as relatives and elders gathered in the courtyard of our home, the ceremony gradually became more than a cultural observance. It became a meeting point of generations where memories of the past, responsibilities of the present and hopes for the future quietly converged.
Family in Absence and Presence
My daughter is the first grandchild in our family, and naturally the occasion carried deep emotional meaning. I often found myself wishing that my parents were still alive to witness such a moment in her life.
My mother, Thangjam Ongbi Yumnam Radhe, passed away on 28 September 2024 at the age of 85. Her passing left behind a quiet emptiness that continues to remind us of her warmth and patience. My father, Thangjam Karunamaya Singh, passed away on 19 March 2018 at the age of 81, leaving behind a legacy of discipline, integrity and public service.
In our family, I am the third among five siblings. My eldest brother Thangjam Sanjeev Singh and my second brother Thangjam Sanjoy Singh are no longer with us, and their absence continues to leave a deep void in our lives. After me comes my sister Sanjeeta Thangjam, who now lives in the United Kingdom, and our youngest brother Thangjam Doren Singh, who resides in the United States.
Although they could not attend the ceremony physically, their blessings travelled across continents through calls and messages, reminding me that family bonds often extend far beyond geographical distance.
Life’s journey also brought new members into our extended family. My stepmother Thangjam Ongbi Asha Devi became part of our lives and through her we have two younger step siblings, Thangjam Aruna Devi and Thangjam Arun Singh, both younger than my youngest brother Doren.
Among those present that day, the presence of my uncle Thangjam Pratibhamaya Singh, MPS (Retd), my father’s younger brother, was particularly moving. Despite illness and advancing age, he came to bless his first granddaughter. Watching him see the ritual quietly and with dignity was one of the most emotional moments of the day.
In that simple act, I felt as though the blessings of my parents were reaching us through him.
The Thangjam and Nongmeikapam Association
Our family’s long association with the Nongmeikapam lineage begins with my grandmother Nongmeikapam Ibeyaima Devi, my father’s mother. Widowed at a young age, she raised her children within the Nongmeikapam household, where they received support and guidance during a difficult period of their lives.
Over time, this shared history created a bond of familiarity and respect between the two families.
Because of this background, people sometimes casually remark that the Thangjams are almost like Nongmeikapams. In reality, such remarks simply reflect the closeness that developed through years of association. The Thangjams remain Thangjams and the Nongmeikapams remain Nongmeikapams. What exists between the two families is not a question of identity but a relationship rooted in gratitude, respect and shared history.
It was in that spirit that I invited elders of the Nongmeikapam family, including male elders, their wives and maternal female relatives, to attend my daughter’s Waroipot ceremony and bless the occasion.
Legacy of Education
Among the most respected figures in the Nongmeikapam lineage was Nongmeikapam Gopal Singh (1884–1971), an educator and social reformer whose belief in the transformative power of education left a lasting imprint on Manipur. He was my great grandfather and the father of my grandmother Ibeyaima Devi.
His vision led to the establishment of Nongmeikapam Gopal College which grew to become one of the important centres of higher education in Manipur, nurturing generations of students who later contributed to the intellectual and public life of the State.
In my own writings as a journalist, I have often reflected on the life and legacy of Nongmeikapam Gopal Singh not only as an educational pioneer but also as someone whose influence shaped the history of my own family. My grandfather Thangjam Raghumani Singh passed away when my father was still young, leaving my grandmother Nongmeikapam Ibeyaima Devi widowed at an early age.
During those difficult years, the guidance and support of Nongmeikapam Gopal Singh and his sons played an important role in helping raise and educate my father, Thangjam Karunamaya Singh. Their encouragement ensured that the son of a young widow did not lose the opportunity for education, discipline and mentorship that later shaped his life and career.
In many ways, the story that began with Nongmeikapam Gopal Singh continued through my grandmother Ibeyaima Devi and my father Karunamaya Singh, and has quietly travelled across generations.
As I stood during my daughter’s Waroipot ceremony watching elders offer their blessings, I realised that this moment represented not just one family celebration but the unfolding journey of several generations.
Continuing the Legacy of Service
In his article titled "Last of His Ilk" published in The Statesman, senior journalist Yambem Laba, whom I regard as my mentor, wrote about my father with deep respect.
It was Yambem Laba who introduced me to journalism and encouraged me to join Imphal Free Press in the year 2000 under the editorship of Pradip Phanjoubam.
One of my earliest assignments was to interview my father when he was serving as Special Rapporteur of the Manipur Human Rights Commission. Before that interview, however, Laba gave me my first lesson in journalism in a rather unexpected way. To my surprise, he asked me to write an article on a cat. It was a simple but memorable lesson in observation and honesty in writing.
Laba described my father as belonging to the Harnett school of policing, shaped under Captain Harnett of the Manipur Rifles. My father had earlier undergone commando training during his service with the Border Security Force, yet he remained known as an old school officer who believed authority must always remain within the bounds of law.
KARUNA and the Recovery Movement
During his tenure as Inspector General of Prisons, my father supported the early recovery movement that led to the formation of the KARUNA Group, the first fellowship of Narcotics Anonymous in Manipur.
The first Narcotics Anonymous meeting in the State took place on 4 August 1987 at Don Bosco School in Chingmeirong, marking an important milestone in community based recovery and mutual support.
This work resonates deeply with my own writings on drug use, addiction and ethical care that I have published over the years. Many of those reflections were shaped by the example my father set that society must combine law with compassion and offer people the chance to rebuild their lives.
Generations Meeting in a Single Moment
During the ceremony my thoughts also turned to the women who shaped our family across generations.
My grandmother Ibeyaima Devi endured hardship with resilience. My mother Radhe Radhe sustained our home with warmth and quiet strength for decades. And now my daughter stands at the threshold of her own future during the Waroipot ceremony.
In them, I see a quiet continuity, a lineage not only of family name but of care, endurance and grace passed gently from one generation to the next.
As I watched my daughter receive the blessings of elders, I realised that the ceremony was not merely preparing her for marriage. It was a reminder that every family carries forward a legacy of values, sacrifices and memories.
In the end, a Waroipot is not simply about preparing a daughter for marriage. It is about recognising that every new beginning carries within it the quiet blessings of generations who walked the path before us.
The writer is a journalist based in Imphal, Manipur
In the warmth of home, the echoes of past generations bless a young life stepping into its future_
There are moments in life when emotions refuse to remain simple. They gather quietly with joy, memory, gratitude, longing and reflection, forming a feeling that words often struggle to fully capture.
One such moment came during my daughter’s Waroipot, a deeply meaningful ceremony held at my residence as she prepared to step into a new chapter of her life.
In Meitei tradition, Waroipot is far more than a ritual. It represents a family covenant, a moment when elders gather to offer blessings, counsel and goodwill to the younger generation before marriage. It reflects a belief deeply rooted in our culture that important transitions in life should begin with the collective wisdom and goodwill of family.
On that calm morning, as relatives and elders gathered in the courtyard of our home, the ceremony gradually became more than a cultural observance. It became a meeting point of generations where memories of the past, responsibilities of the present and hopes for the future quietly converged.
Family in Absence and Presence
My daughter is the first grandchild in our family, and naturally the occasion carried deep emotional meaning. I often found myself wishing that my parents were still alive to witness such a moment in her life.
My mother, Thangjam Ongbi Yumnam Radhe, passed away on 28 September 2024 at the age of 85. Her passing left behind a quiet emptiness that continues to remind us of her warmth and patience. My father, Thangjam Karunamaya Singh, passed away on 19 March 2018 at the age of 81, leaving behind a legacy of discipline, integrity and public service.
In our family, I am the third among five siblings. My eldest brother Thangjam Sanjeev Singh and my second brother Thangjam Sanjoy Singh are no longer with us, and their absence continues to leave a deep void in our lives. After me comes my sister Sanjeeta Thangjam, who now lives in the United Kingdom, and our youngest brother Thangjam Doren Singh, who resides in the United States.
Although they could not attend the ceremony physically, their blessings travelled across continents through calls and messages, reminding me that family bonds often extend far beyond geographical distance.
Life’s journey also brought new members into our extended family. My stepmother Thangjam Ongbi Asha Devi became part of our lives and through her we have two younger step siblings, Thangjam Aruna Devi and Thangjam Arun Singh, both younger than my youngest brother Doren.
Among those present that day, the presence of my uncle Thangjam Pratibhamaya Singh, MPS (Retd), my father’s younger brother, was particularly moving. Despite illness and advancing age, he came to bless his first granddaughter. Watching him see the ritual quietly and with dignity was one of the most emotional moments of the day.
In that simple act, I felt as though the blessings of my parents were reaching us through him.
The Thangjam and Nongmeikapam Association
Our family’s long association with the Nongmeikapam lineage begins with my grandmother Nongmeikapam Ibeyaima Devi, my father’s mother. Widowed at a young age, she raised her children within the Nongmeikapam household, where they received support and guidance during a difficult period of their lives.
Over time, this shared history created a bond of familiarity and respect between the two families.
Because of this background, people sometimes casually remark that the Thangjams are almost like Nongmeikapams. In reality, such remarks simply reflect the closeness that developed through years of association. The Thangjams remain Thangjams and the Nongmeikapams remain Nongmeikapams. What exists between the two families is not a question of identity but a relationship rooted in gratitude, respect and shared history.
It was in that spirit that I invited elders of the Nongmeikapam family, including male elders, their wives and maternal female relatives, to attend my daughter’s Waroipot ceremony and bless the occasion.
Legacy of Education
Among the most respected figures in the Nongmeikapam lineage was Nongmeikapam Gopal Singh (1884–1971), an educator and social reformer whose belief in the transformative power of education left a lasting imprint on Manipur. He was my great grandfather and the father of my grandmother Ibeyaima Devi.
His vision led to the establishment of Nongmeikapam Gopal College which grew to become one of the important centres of higher education in Manipur, nurturing generations of students who later contributed to the intellectual and public life of the State.
In my own writings as a journalist, I have often reflected on the life and legacy of Nongmeikapam Gopal Singh not only as an educational pioneer but also as someone whose influence shaped the history of my own family. My grandfather Thangjam Raghumani Singh passed away when my father was still young, leaving my grandmother Nongmeikapam Ibeyaima Devi widowed at an early age.
During those difficult years, the guidance and support of Nongmeikapam Gopal Singh and his sons played an important role in helping raise and educate my father, Thangjam Karunamaya Singh. Their encouragement ensured that the son of a young widow did not lose the opportunity for education, discipline and mentorship that later shaped his life and career.
In many ways, the story that began with Nongmeikapam Gopal Singh continued through my grandmother Ibeyaima Devi and my father Karunamaya Singh, and has quietly travelled across generations.
As I stood during my daughter’s Waroipot ceremony watching elders offer their blessings, I realised that this moment represented not just one family celebration but the unfolding journey of several generations.
Continuing the Legacy of Service
In his article titled "Last of His Ilk" published in The Statesman, senior journalist Yambem Laba, whom I regard as my mentor, wrote about my father with deep respect.
It was Yambem Laba who introduced me to journalism and encouraged me to join Imphal Free Press in the year 2000 under the editorship of Pradip Phanjoubam.
One of my earliest assignments was to interview my father when he was serving as Special Rapporteur of the Manipur Human Rights Commission. Before that interview, however, Laba gave me my first lesson in journalism in a rather unexpected way. To my surprise, he asked me to write an article on a cat. It was a simple but memorable lesson in observation and honesty in writing.
Laba described my father as belonging to the Harnett school of policing, shaped under Captain Harnett of the Manipur Rifles. My father had earlier undergone commando training during his service with the Border Security Force, yet he remained known as an old school officer who believed authority must always remain within the bounds of law.
KARUNA and the Recovery Movement
During his tenure as Inspector General of Prisons, my father supported the early recovery movement that led to the formation of the KARUNA Group, the first fellowship of Narcotics Anonymous in Manipur.
The first Narcotics Anonymous meeting in the State took place on 4 August 1987 at Don Bosco School in Chingmeirong, marking an important milestone in community based recovery and mutual support.
This work resonates deeply with my own writings on drug use, addiction and ethical care that I have published over the years. Many of those reflections were shaped by the example my father set that society must combine law with compassion and offer people the chance to rebuild their lives.
Generations Meeting in a Single Moment
During the ceremony my thoughts also turned to the women who shaped our family across generations.
My grandmother Ibeyaima Devi endured hardship with resilience. My mother Radhe Radhe sustained our home with warmth and quiet strength for decades. And now my daughter stands at the threshold of her own future during the Waroipot ceremony.
In them, I see a quiet continuity, a lineage not only of family name but of care, endurance and grace passed gently from one generation to the next.
As I watched my daughter receive the blessings of elders, I realised that the ceremony was not merely preparing her for marriage. It was a reminder that every family carries forward a legacy of values, sacrifices and memories.
In the end, a Waroipot is not simply about preparing a daughter for marriage. It is about recognising that every new beginning carries within it the quiet blessings of generations who walked the path before us.
The writer is a journalist based in Imphal, Manipur